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Think like... OscarTM

A series of unlikely business gurus

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You may have won a prize at school, or been voted salesman of the year at your company, or even been applauded as the best in the country at something, but chances are you haven't got a little gold statuette in your house. (If you are an Academy Award winner, congratulations, have a nice flight and enjoy the movie. You might be in it.)

And when we have bounded up on stage at various hotels to collect our treasured trophies, someone will invariably have referred to the accolades on offer as being "the Oscars of the marketing/potato/insert-your-own-industry-here industry." But they will have been wrong. There is only one OscarTM.

Yes, our friend OscarTM has become a generic trademark, just like HooverTM, JacuzziTM and SellotapeTM. Not that he likes to shout about it. In fact he doesn't say very much at all — he just stands there, Sphinx-like (although strictly speaking the Sphinx lies down, but you get the drift).

Charisma such as OscarTM's comes from being a symbol and gaining power over time. In a meeting scenario, he's not going to say much, but he's the sort of character whose very presence in the room is enough to carry weight and power. And, let's face it, going into a tough negotiation with a team member who, while everyone else is sitting around the table, stands bolt upright holding a massive sword, is certainly going to concentrate some minds.

He's also a stickler for excellence, and if you're hanging out with him it's because he considers you worthy of his company. His friendship is the ultimate badge of honour.

The downsides? He doesn't take advice easily, literally having a tin ear (92.5 per cent tin and 7.5 per cent copper, to be precise) and he has a tendency to make people cry. But beyond that he's a rare and treasured employee you'll want to keep forever. And he makes a terrific doorstop.

A tree, Gandalf... learn more business tips from our series of unlikely gurus.

Derek Harbinson

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